Shame can be both good and bad. It can protect us from hurting others by commiting shameless acts but it can also be incredibly destructive when we feel ashamed for our mere existence. Shame is something that our abusive caregivers pass onto us by shaming us for things that they shouldn’t have.
Watch my video for more.
Love Athina
In this post, I wanted to mention the important topic of gaslighting.
If we have survived years of emotional abuse by a parent or a partner who has been gaslighting us, this then ends up becoming our own internal voice. This is known as gaslighting ourselves.
Watch the video to find out more!
Although most of my content focuses on what narcissism and dysfunction look like and I highlight how to avoid toxic individuals and protect yourself from them, in this post I want to talk about the importance of healthy mothering and what this actually looks like.
For those of us who didn’t have a healthy mother as a role model, having children of our own can be incredibly daunting, scary and overwhelming. We might be terrified of repeating dysfunctional patterns of behaviour and we want to make sure that our children are happy and healthy.
In this YouTube video, I talk about what a healthy loving mother looks like. Although I am not a mother myself, I have many friends who are mums and I can see what a wonderful job they are doing with their children. I have also extensively researched good mothering from a developmental and psychological viewpoint. I very much know what I wouldn’t do if I ever became a mother and that would be to not treat my child the way my mother treated me.
I experienced emotional neglect, emotional abuse, lack of attunement from my mother, emotional parentification and continuous invalidation of my emotions. I was born to ‘serve’ my mother’s needs and later to also look after my special needs brother.
If you are a mother then I would love to hear your thoughts in the comments section.
Much love,
Athina
Narcissistic mothers, especially the covert type, are experts at projection and will habitually project their own negative emotions onto their children.
Selfishness is one of them.
Many adult children of narcissistic parents will have experienced this in some capacity or their parent may have simply called them something else, such as ‘spoilt’ or ‘too sensitive’.
What is your experience?
What is repetition compulsion and why do we do it?
Is it something we have control over?
Repetition compulsion happens as a result of childhood trauma.
Watch the video to find out more
Love Athina
When this day finally arrives, the grief process is complicated and is full of contradicting emotions.
Losing a dysfunctional mother can be freeing but can also be devastating.
Watch the video to find out more
Some covert narcissist mothers lie about their child’s health. They present a completely different story to reality, in order to garner sympathy from others. This is a very dangerous type of manipulation. It is also not fair on the child who is suffering because of this type of lying and abuse.
It is important for educators & medical personnel to keep an eye out for this type of mother. If a mother comes across as extremely pushy in a school because she wants her child to be diagnosed with a learning disability, then teachers must tread carefully. This is even more important when a mother is telling doctors her child is sick or mentally ill in any way .
If you have had experience with this, then please reach out and share you story. If you need support, then please reach out to a mental health professional.
A topic very close to my heart, having grown up with a narcissistic father I adored who also happened to be highly narcissistic and dysfunctional.
My father passed away 3 years ago now and I am still dealing with the conflicting emotions his death left me with.
If you struggle with the effects of having had a narcissistic father, then this video is for you! Much love to you!
Athina
Narcissistic mother & son enmeshment is real and is something that affects many adult sons of narcissistic mothers.
If you feel that your mother is overly controlling towards you, doesn’t allow you to form relationships & is envious of your partner, then you must watch this video to educate yourself on this destructive dynamic.
If you have any questions at all or need support talking about your experience with a mother like this, then please get in touch by emailing me at courageisallyouneed@gmail.com
Love Athina
What happens when the narcissist in your life is onto you?
How do you deal with this and how do you protect yourself?
What the video to find out more and share with anyone you think may find this helpful.
Love Athina
couragecoaching.net 