How to deal with loneliness


Loneliness is an unpleasant feeling that a lot of people experience at some point in their lives. Loneliness is a feeling of emptiness or hollowness inside you.You might experience loneliness as a feeling that something is not right, a kind of minor emptiness. Or you might feel loneliness as a very intense deprivation and deep pain.For the most part, it is something that can be remedied quickly by reaching out to family or friends.

What happens however if you have a chronic feeling of loneliness? What happens when you don’t have any supportive family to turn to? or even friends? Do you end up feeling even more isolated? Do you retreat further into your shell and just tell yourself that this is how you are meant to be? Lonely and helpless?

A lot of the time unfortunately this happens. Loneliness is paired with depression and this can lead to further complications.If  you don’t have the appropriate support, the downward spiral gets worse and worse. Loneliness is a passive state.

The most important thing about loneliness is that we have to remind ourselves that it is a state of mind, a feeling, not a fact.So what are we doing to enable our loneliness? This is a really important question to ask ourselves.

If we lost a loved one to death or have grief related to trauma, then it is important to acknowledge our feelings. Acknowledging our feelings of loneliness is the starting point to dealing with them. Expressing these feelings in numerous ways is the bext step. If we don’t have a friend or family member to express these feelings to, then we have to try and find someone else who might listen, like a counselor or mental health volunteer. We can also express our loneliness through art or writing a blog.

As I said before, loneliness is a passive state. So how do you change something passive? Your turn into something active.This might be a simple thing to state and some people might find it hard to make changes, but it is crucial to understand that if you do nothing about it, it won’t change.

Being active means that we reach out to others and that we maybe take up a class doing something we enjoy.This is a good way to connect with other people. It means that we can choose to maybe do some volunteering, as helping others can bring a feeling of fulfillment and reduce the feeling of loneliness. It means practicing different acts of kindness towards people that really need it. It also means the possibility of getting a new pet, or helping in an animal shelter.

It is very helpful to write a list of the things we enjoy and which things in particular helped us feel less lonely in the past.

It also very important to fight those self-defeating thoughts we may have, that tell us we can’t feel better and that we will always be lonely. Even if we are very depressed, we must fight this feeling and push ourselves past the negative feelings of not wanting to leave the house or connect to others. We have to challenge the passiveness and do things that might makes us a little uncomfortable.

What are your experiences of dealing with loneliness?

Love Athina ♥

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Author: Courage Coaching

I provide empowerment, empathy & support. I specialise in dealing with dysfunctional relationships, particularly narcissistic abuse & encouraging self-compassion.

5 thoughts on “How to deal with loneliness”

  1. I deal with loneliness every single day. I have no family left and my friends I have pushed away. I pushed them away because they dont understand my ptsd or try to. I also feel loneliness because I struggle to go places because of my ptsd. Loneliness is horrible.


    1. I am so sorry you deal with loneliness daily. I really hope that by being part of the wordpress community, you can find a sense of belonging with those of us who know how tough ptsd can be. Many of us have made life-long friends, due to the fact that there is trust and understanding. I hope that you trust us enough to help ease your loneliness. Much love

      Liked by 1 person

  2. I sometime think that those of us with mental illness are not isolated by choice, but by society. We feel different and experience life differently than those who don’t experience mental health problems and that puts up a wall between us. There is stigma surrounding mental illness that is not there for other illnesses. AA groups provide support and sponsorship, breast cancer survivors walk together and fundraise for medial advances, communities reach out to the elderly and physically ill with meal trains and home visits. I don’t devalue those systems of support as they are lifesaving. Mental illness is unfortunately still something people fear and misunderstand. I do agree, we have to keep trying to connect and hopefully we will find the support we need, online or in person. Thanks for your post!

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thank you so much for taking the time to comment so openly. You are so right..It is still stigmatised so much and unfortunately makes things so much tougher for us. Luckily there are a few charities around that support people with mental health ( In the UK I know of ‘Rethink Mental illness’ & ‘Mind’) but there isn’t enough being done. I really hope you have enough support in your own life & I wish you all the best xx

      Liked by 2 people

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