cptsd – Page 3

You are the light that refused to surrender

‘You are the light that refused to surrender’ is a wonderful way to look at your healing journey after experiencing trauma.

If you, like me, have a history of trauma, you will be very familiar with the ups and downs of living with CPTSD. For me personally, having hope in my lowest moments, was the 1 thing that kept me going when things truly felt hopeless.

Having hope means that you allow yourself to believe that the day WILL come where you WILL feel better, where things will feel less scary, less isolating and less depressing.

It’s important to never stop hoping when things get tough and to allow yourself to embrace that feeling wholeheartedly.

Practicing gratitude is also extremely important for improving mental health. Be grateful for any tiny steps of progress you make, even if you managed to do 1 additional thing today that you didn’t manage to do the day before.

Living with mental illness is never easy but it can be manageable. Living with mental illness means that you might have to constantly make adjustments to the way you live your life, in order to feel better. These adjustments may look like the following: Changing your diet, adding more exercise to your daily routine, cutting out sugar, moving to the countryside, ending a relationship, leaving a stressful job, practicing meditation, seeking out support from a specialised therapist, going on a retreat, taking supplements and/or using medication. Each journey with mental illness is unique so what might work for one person may not necessarily work for another. Try things out, see what works and go from there.

Darkness may have been a big part of your past and may still creep up on you in the present. This is realistic as life can be tough even when you don’t live with a mental illness.The only way through this darkness however is to find the light. The light could be anything: a therapist, a close friend, a partner, a beloved pet, being in nature, a safe space, art, music or anything else that brings you comfort.

Most importantly however, you must try and find the light within yourself, within your heart and soul.

In those moments of relentless anxiety, depression or emotional flashbacks, love yourself unconditionally. Take yourself by the hand, like you would a small child and tell yourself ‘ I’ve got you, you are not alone’… ‘ I am there for you, unconditionally’.

If you are having a tough day, then I hope this post helps a little.

Keep going..keep living..you’ve got this!

Love Athina x

What is traumatic aloneness?

Traumatic aloneness is something that I have experienced over and over again in my 41 years on this planet. It is a natural result of having grown up in a dysfunctional family where my parents didn’t meet my emotional needs.

”Psychodynamic theorist Gerald Adler attributed an early failure in nurturing to the experience of annihilation. He contended that the absence of a primary positive soothing caregiver creates an insatiable emptiness that impedes the development of a stable, healthy sense of self”. (quote source:https://www.avenuetherapies.com/blog/theres-lonely-theres-alone-and-then-theres-worse-traumatic-aloneness/

”Traumatic aloneness is a hole that was supposed to be filled when we were babies with the things we needed to feel loved and important. It is a hole that can now never be filled…To be healed it needs to be recognised, listened to and nurtured. Trauma therapy can go some way to repair it and ease the pain, but the hole although smaller, might always be there. However, we can learn to recognise it, soothe it, hold it and nurture it. We can learn to have connections and closeness with others”.

Watch my YouTube video to find out more:

Love Athina

https://youtube.com/watch?v=2WowomXS-eI%3Fsi%3DyC3FxgfnGQn01Qd4

6 Lies narcissistic parents tell their children

Narcissistic parents are incredibly destructive to a child’s emotional & mental wellbeing. The 6 lies I talk about in this video, are very common in most narcissistically abusive households.

If this is your background or if you suspect that your upbringing may have been dysfunctional, then this video is for you!

Love Athina

https://youtube.com/watch?v=E3SeAa91bL0%3Fsi%3DTCnZOjlDFd4pTeV7

Why you are revictimized (after parental narcissistic abuse)

Revictimization is common when you have suffered childhood trauma. Childhood trauma, particularly narcissistic abuse primes individuals to be more vulnerable to further abuse.

If you find yourself constantly attracting toxic individuals, then this video is for you.

Love Athina

https://youtube.com/watch?v=2v5EjRXoIWw%3Fsi%3DQ5nqqVGyKEvCX3Xo

CPTSD-Living with feelings of shame

Shame can be both good and bad. It can protect us from hurting others by commiting shameless acts but it can also be incredibly destructive when we feel ashamed for our mere existence. Shame is something that our abusive caregivers pass onto us by shaming us for things that they shouldn’t have.

Watch my video for more.

Love Athina

https://youtube.com/watch?v=mJYI2qZU1e8%3Fsi%3DkvzYXSLcBPgCZ5fh

Did your narcissistic parent call you selfish?

Narcissistic mothers, especially the covert type, are experts at projection and will habitually project their own negative emotions onto their children.

Selfishness is one of them.

Many adult children of narcissistic parents will have experienced this in some capacity or their parent may have simply called them something else, such as ‘spoilt’ or ‘too sensitive’.

What is your experience?

Repetition compulsion-A result of childhood trauma

What is repetition compulsion and why do we do it?

Is it something we have control over?

Repetition compulsion happens as a result of childhood trauma.

Watch the video to find out more

Love Athina

How does it feel when your narcissistic mother dies?

When this day finally arrives, the grief process is complicated and is full of contradicting emotions.

Losing a dysfunctional mother can be freeing but can also be devastating.

Watch the video to find out more

Covert narcissist mothers-Using illness as manipulation

Some covert narcissist mothers lie about their child’s health. They present a completely different story to reality, in order to garner sympathy from others. This is a very dangerous type of manipulation. It is also not fair on the child who is suffering because of this type of lying and abuse.

It is important for educators & medical personnel to keep an eye out for this type of mother. If a mother comes across as extremely pushy in a school because she wants her child to be diagnosed with a learning disability, then teachers must tread carefully. This is even more important when a mother is telling doctors her child is sick or mentally ill in any way .

If you have had experience with this, then please reach out and share you story. If you need support, then please reach out to a mental health professional.