Wishing all my readers, fellow bloggers and friends a Happy New Year full of love, health & good memories!
May this year be your strongest, your most loving & your most cared for.
Let there be compassion & understanding for those without a home or a family.
Let there be empathy for those who are suffering with ill health.
Lets support each other in this tough journey called ‘Life’.
Love to you all
Athina ♥
Hi everyone,
This is my 2nd attempt to write this blog post, after the last one was unfortunately lost. 😦
I hope you all had a good Christmas weekend and managed to relax and enjoy time with your loved ones. For those of you who find Christmas tough due to past trauma or dysfunctional relationships, you have just survived yet another Christmas, so give yourself a pat on the back and treat yourself to something you enjoy. The New Year is nearly here and with it comes new hope and a renewed sense of direction. 🙂
The following youtube video is 1 day late, due to the fact that I allowed myself a little time to relax over the last 3 days. I caught up on some much needed sleep and I started studying for my German exam (which is fast approaching).
In my own recovery back in 2008, I was introduced to the concept of letting go of relationships that no longer served me. I was introduced to the concept of emotionally detaching from a toxic person. Although at first this was extremely hard to do, with practice and with time, I slowly started making changes for the better. I started learning to put my self-care first and to set boundaries. I started noticing the repetitive patterns that were present in my relationships and I started questioning the reasons as to why I couldn’t choose healthier relationships. In my case, the narcissistically abusive background I come from, is what influenced my choice of abusive or unavailable partners, friends & even colleagues.
This video is for those of you who are just starting out in your recovery from dysfunctional relationships, so I really hope it helps ♥
Love Athina ♥
© All blog posts and images are owned by me and Courage Coaching. Please don’t use without consent and only re-blog if you would like to use the information on here.
Christmas time isn’t always as cheerful as it is meant to be..It isn’t what you see on tv or in films..It isn’t all happy, with big families, presents and lots of love..It has most definetely not been this way for me..
Christmas is a tumultuous time for those of us with trauma & loss..It is a deeply disappointing time for those of us who are parentless..
This empty hole inside me has resurfaced with even more of a vengeance..
All the depressing thoughts that say ‘I am bad, I am not enough, I am guilty’ are whispering in my ear..How can any child not feel emotional pain when their own parent is not able to love them unconditionally?!
I am missing my Dad at the moment..The Dad I thought I had & hoped I had all these years, until reality really hit me hard last year when he turned against…
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When a relationship starts off with subtle signs of possessiveness or teasing that undermines the partner, this may then escalate to full blown domestic violence.
When one partner is trying to control the other partner in ways that are sometimes confusing and feel uncomfortable, then this may then escalate to complete and utter isolation from family and friends.
Sometimes the signs in abusive relationships are so subtle, that it is difficult to tell if someone is going to end up being abusive or not. Abuse can only be emotional and mental in some relationships. It doesn’t necessarily have to be physical and sexual. In other cases, it can be a combination of mental, physical, sexual & financial abuse.
The video I did today is important for those of you who know someone you suspect may be in an abusive relationship.If you suspect that it is actually your partner that is abusive, then please get in touch and I can put you in contact with the appropriate charities and organisations that can help you.
Love Athina ♥
© All blog posts and images are owned by me and Courage Coaching. Please don’t use without consent and only re-blog if you would like to use the information on here.
Hello to all of you 🙂
I hope you are all well or at least trying to be.
Thank you to those of you who have recently followed my blog and youtube channel.I am very grateful. Tomorrow I have the morning off my German class so will be catching up as much as possible on all your posts and comments.Despite my busy schedule at the moment, I have still been managing to upload videos to Youtube every week and luckily the topics I talk about are still helping a few of you.
The Q & A videos have been a success and I still have quite a few unanswered emails to sort through, so please bear with me.
The Christmas break (although most definetely not my favourite time of year) will give me the opportunity to do more videos in response to your questions.
Today’s YouTube video focuses on the cycle of codependence and how is starts & worsens over time.
Codependency is very real and is a result of living in a home with an alcoholic parent, an abusive parent or a parent with a mental illness. Codependency develops when you put your own needs & feelings aside as a child, to care for & comfort a sick parent. Not everyone agrees with this point of view, however I have been through it and know the challenges associated with it.
Reaching out to all of those who struggle with their mental health means the world to me, especially to those who have suffered trauma and live with the result of this trauma.
I know how it feels to be invalidated.
I know how it feels to be called too sensitive or to just get over it.
Stigma towards mental illness is very much alive.
By sharing your experiences and spreading awareness in any way possible, this helps others understand better what it might be like for those who struggle.
If you can relate to this video, or think it will help someone you care about, then please share it with love ♥
Hugs Athina ♥
© All blog posts and images are owned by me and Courage Coaching. Please don’t use without consent and only re-blog if you would like to use the information on here.
Dear readers,
This post today is only a quick one. I thought I would share this week’s Youtube video which will also be shared on my Child Within blog, so it reaches more people. It is a Q & A video on narcissism and in this case, one of my viewers wanted to know whether narcissists are paranoid.
This is something I have had first hand experience with and I know how detrimental it can be to those that surround the narcissist. My father’s paranoia was incredibly magnetic and my husband and I, as well as his friends and colleagues, all got sucked into his overly paranoid outlook just before and after his suicide attempt.
If you have had to deal with narcissistic family or partners who were overly paranoid, please feel free to share your experience.
Love Athina ♥
© All blog posts and images are owned by me and Courage Coaching. Please don’t use without consent and only re-blog if you would like to use the information on here.
Over-thinking an issue or event is a very common coping mechanism for dealing with stress. When there are unresolved issues or stressful situations with more than one possible solution, this is usually what leads to never-ending ruminating.
Unfortunately, over-thinking is usually linked to depression & anxiety. People that already suffer from a mental illness, are usually big over-thinkers. However, someone can also become mentally ill by starting to think destructively. All it takes is one single stressful life event to trigger unhelpful ruminating.
The best way to cope with your possible over-thinking, is to look at the way you think and to analyse the different thinking errors (otherwise known as cognitive distortions) you may be indulging in.
If you don’t know much about the different types of cognitive distortions, then click below:
Secondly, it is important to challenge any unhelpful thinking patterns by looking honestly at the evidence that supports those thoughts. Sometimes over-thinking can really spiral out of control and what may have started off as a minor problem, might have escalated into a catastrophe. Thinking isn’t always based on actual facts.
Thirdly, it is important to replace any unhelpful or overly dramatic thoughts with more grounded and sensible thoughts. If you are overly critical of yourself or others, then maybe try to tone it down a little. If you are worried that something bad is going to happen, then ask yourself ‘What are the chances of this really happening’? and ‘Is this really as bad as I think?Give yourself more constructive, positive thoughts and even write them down on paper if it helps!
Lastly, try and distract yourself when you are lost in endless over-thinking. Do something you enjoy, which will stop your mind from going into an uncomfortable state of hyperarousal.
Love Athina ♥
© All blog posts and images are owned by me and Courage Coaching. Please don’t use without consent and only re-blog if you would like to use the information on here.
PTSD doesn’t only affect the person suffering with it.
I hope this video helps those of you who are close to someone who suffers with PTSD.
PTSD can affect partners as well as close family members, or flatmates.
There is the possibity of secondary traumatisation.
Love Athina ♥
© All blog posts and images are owned by me and Courage Coaching. Please don’t use without consent and only re-blog if you would like to use the information on here.
Can you tell I am ecstatic it’s Friday evening? Well I am..very much so! 🙂
I get to stay in bed tomorrow morning and drink a glass or two of red wine tonight!
I get to catch up on my blogging and go for a meal with a friend.
I get to spend quality time with my hubby which is just perfect.
I am feeling very grateful at the moment, although the gratefulness this time arises after the latest challenge I have set myself.
I finally gave in, after 2,5 years of living in Germany and have just started an intensive German language course. It is exhausting and at times overwhelming. 6 hours of German, 5 days a week is A LOT. 4 hours in the morning and around 2 hours of study afterwards..I have needed a nap twice this week after my course and been getting more eye strain and headaches than usual. By throwing my CPTSD into the mix as well, I end up giving myself one big fat challenge!
In one of my previous posts, I talked about why I didn’t want to learn German. The reasons were many and I have no shame in admitting that I just don’t like the language because it is hard to learn and I just didn’t have the motivation. However, as hubby and I were discussing whether we were going to stay in Germany or return to the UK, I admitted that the only way for me to really know if I could live in Germany long term, was to actually learn the language!
I promised myself that I would give the intensive course my best shot and if after completing the first part, I still didn’t feel like I could communicate in a basic way, then we would move back to the UK.
Germany has been great for me in the last couple of years and it feels like home now.We are settled and the idea of moving back to the UK is great on one hand as I deeply miss it but on the other hand it is a hassle. Constantly changing addresses is tiresome and renting in the UK isn’t as comfortable as it is in Germany!Settling is important when you get to your mid thirties!
I have another 6 weeks of intensive German classes, so forgive me for my absence in the blogging world over the next weeks. I have already lined up some Youtube videos for each Monday.Some are Q & A videos and some are just informational.
I hope you are all doing well and not letting the upcoming holiday season get you too down! Keeping busy is good for me personally at the moment & feeling grateful also greatly impoves my overall mood.
What challenge have you set yourself recently? How are you coping with the upcoming festive season? Christmas isn’t a joyous time for everyone..
Love Athina ♥
This is my 2nd video from my Q & A video series. My followers, viewers & subscribers ask the questions and I answer to the best of my knowledge with a video.
I really hope that this video is useful to those of you who suffer from insomnia in general and I hope it also provides a little more insight for those of you who have specific PTSD related Insomnia.
PTSD related insomnia is a very tough symptom to tackle and is usually managed with a combination of anti-depressants, the short term use of sedatives and talking therapy( all under the watchful eye of a psychotherapist or psychiatrist).
Love Athina ♥
© All blog posts and images are owned by me and Courage Coaching. Please don’t use without consent and only re-blog if you would like to use the information on here.
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