Trauma is a loss, so it must be grieved

Trauma happens to all of us..We all go through life with a few small traumas. Most of the time, small traumas or small losses don’t leave emotional scars. We just keep going and adjust to whatever life throws at us.

If on the other hand, the trauma or loss we suffer is profound, then this means that we will be more deeply affected by it and will need longer to overcome it or learn to live with the affects.

In this video, I touch on the importance of grief and the 3 main stages of grief you go through when dealing with a major loss or trauma.

Love ♥ Athina

© All blog posts and images are owned by me and Courage Coaching. Please don’t use without consent and only re-blog if you would like to use the information on here.

Be there for someone

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Today is International World Peace Day. This highlights the destruction that war is currently causing all around the world even more and I feel deeply saddened that things are the way they are. Humans will never learn from their mistakes and greed & power seem to always take the forefront unfortunately.

So what can we do in this ever changing world of destruction, mass murder & grief?

We can’t seem to stop the war & voilence, as world leaders always have the last say in what happens..We can’t always prevent bad things from happening  but we can make a small difference by being kind to others. We can help someone in need & offer them some comfort.

Sometimes people don’t want to or can’t ask for help. They may feel too embarassed, too isolated, too scared. They might be so traumatised that they can’t even speak. They might have learnt the hard way that you can’t trust anyone because they have always been let down.

I have been in a position of vulnerability many times in my life. I used to be someone who was too afraid to trust others. I used to be someone who was too afraid to ask for support. I thought I was a burden because I was made to believe that I was.

How many of you give money to a beggar on the street? How many of you help the homeless? How many of you contribute to bettering the world in some small way by maybe helping the refugees or protecting familes from domestic violence?

I’d love to hear your experiences.

I personally, don’t always give money to the homeless or to beggars. Here in Europe, I know that there are a lot of people who are made to beg for money but don’t get to keep it. Their gang leader keeps it.What I try and do instead is give people items that provide some comfort. A scarf, some food, a hot drink etc..

I also aspire to work in areas where I support others. I am currently looking after a little boy who has a single mother. My heart goes out to them both.I only found out recently that the mother is being emotionally abused by the father of the boy, who is telling her he will turn up on their doorstep after 2 years of ignoring the child. He lies to her and makes threats. I have promised to support her if she needs me. She has asked me to entertain the wee boy at the moment, in case things get akward. This little boy doesn’t even remember his Dad. He has only just turned 4 and it is a delicate matter.

Helping out this small family is my way of giving back to the world and supporting others. I want to care for others, as I know what it feels like to not be cared for. Nobody should feel that way.Nobody should have to feel scared and alone.

Love Athina ♥

© All blog posts and images are owned by me and Courage Coaching. Please don’t use without consent and only re-blog if you would like to use the information on here.

Shame

Shame is caused by negative messages. The shame I am highlighting in this video is caused by dysfunctional parents. Shame is insidious and can have detrimental effects on the way we view ourselves and others.

This is something I am very familiar with as a survivor of narcissistic abuse and I want to highlight the cause of shame, so people can maybe identify with what might have been said to them as children and so they can find a way to move forward and heal.

Love ♥ Athina

© All blog posts and images are owned by me and Courage Coaching. Please don’t use without consent and only re-blog if you would like to use the information on here.

 

On Codependent Relationships

Dr. Eric Perry's avatarDr. Eric Perry’s Blog

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“A lot of the time codependency looks like intense love, but “needing” another person often stems from fear, not love.” ~Jennifer Kass

1. You feel like you will die without the other person
The first time I ever experienced what I would call true love, I began to think about my mortality more than ever. I would think about the fact that my time with my partner is not infinite. I would actually get sad thinking about it. It is important to differentiate between wanting great memories to last forever from an anxious need to be always close to our partner. It is not to say that we cannot depend on our partner in a healthy way, but it really depends on how deep that dependency goes. If you feel like you cannot survive without your partner to the extent that you would not even want to live, then you might question whether there…

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Intolerance to vulnerability is NOT OK!

Intolerance to vulnerability is everywhere.

Dysfunctional homes have this at their core.Children don’t feel safe to express emotions of sadness or pain..Children are taught that it is not ok to have sad or angry emotions..that they will be a burden if they dare to express these emotions..

This is not acceptable..This is emotional abuse..

Physical vulnerability is different to emotional vulnerability..When someone is physically disabled or physically ill, he/she seems to have more understanding from others..because you can see his/her illness physically..When a disability is emotional or mental however, people are quicker to dismiss it..This is where the stigma of mental illness comes in..Every single person out there with a mental disorder, is vulnerable..If they suffer with anxiety or depression, this makes them vulnerable..Just as much as someone who has a heart condition, or cancer or any other condition..

A vulnerable person is someone who struggles with day to day life.

Vulnerability refers to the inability to withstand the effects of a hostile environment (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vulnerability).

People with mental illness frequently become vulnerable and easy targets of physical and mental abuse.

People with mental illness can have poor boundaries, emotional dysregulation and many other extremely debilitating symptoms. They deserve the same compassion as those with obvious physical disabilities. They deserve the right to be able to talk about their struggles.

Love ♥ Athina

© All blog posts and images are owned by me and Courage Coaching. Please don’t use without consent and only re-blog if you would like to use the information on here.

CPTSD= Courage Progress Tenacity Survival Determination

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Healing from PTSD is tough! Healing from Complex PTSD is even tougher.

In honour of World Suicide Prevention Awareness Day, I want to tell every single one of you survivors out there that you can look at your PTSD & CPTSD differently, just for today! ♥

C-PTSD = COURAGE PROGRESS TENACITY SURVIVAL DETERMINATION

Love ♥ Athina

© All blog posts and images are owned by me and Courage Coaching. Please don’t use without consent and only re-blog if you would like to use the information on here.

 

September 10th-World Suicide Prevention Day

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YouTube video:Is it possible to completely cure Complex PTSD?Tips for a better chance at healing.

I hope you are all enjoying your weekend to the best of your ability.To those of you struggling at the moment, I hope you are doing ok and reaching out for support. The blogging community is filled with wonderful, caring people and it is important to keep this community positive and encouraging. To those of you who need it, I am sending you a big hug! ♥ Take it one step at a time ♥

As some of my regural readers know, I am off to London tomorrow until Thursday to visit family and friends, while my husband is away for work.My Youtube videos are usually posted every Monday, however due to the fact I am off to London tomorrow, I decided to do this one a little earlier.

I talk about Complex PTSD once again, as there are so many of you who suffer with it and I am pretty sure that you need some hope, to keep fighting it and keep moving forward. Through lots of research and from my own personal experience, I talk about the most helpful things you can do to support your healing.

Much love Athina ♥

© All blog posts and images are owned by me and Courage Coaching. Please don’t use without consent and only re-blog if you would like to use the information on here.