Creating a new normal – Covid 19

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Dealing with a pandemic of this magnitude, we are all understandably becoming anxious and uncertain about the future.

All the little things that consumed our life previously are no longer as important.

There is a new reality now.. One of survival, planning and isolating.

For those of you who are already living with C-PTSD, anxiety, depression and other mental health conditions, this time is especially triggering..

For those of you in the ‘at risk groups’, life can feel terrifying..

Here are a few tips that are keeping me sane and might help you too!

  •  Try and hold onto the positives even though the reality is extremely daunting.
  • Whenever anxiety creeps in, take several deep breaths and be kind to yourself.
  • Keep a daily log of 3 things you are grateful for on each day.

We are dealing with an unprecedented reality, it is normal to feel overwhelmed.

  • Try and stop yourself from engaging too much with social media or news on the Coronavirus.
  • Distract yourself with things you enjoy.  There is nothing wrong with binge watching Netflix series at this time or reading lots of books..
  • Even though you may be stuck at home, make sure you create a new stable routine for yourself and your family. Exercise, eat at the same time every day, do an activity together, have some alone time, have a shower at the same time each day etc. Since you have lost your normal routine, creating a new routine is extremely important.
  • Try and eat healthy food as much as possible..Limit alcohol and sugar. Keep your immune system as healthy as possible
  • Engage in your hobbies as much as possible
  • Write your thoughts and worries in a journal or online blog
  • Keep in touch with family and friends

How are you coping with this in your country?

I hope you are looking after yourselves at this difficult time dear readers.

Just remember, we are all in this together!

Lots of love

Athina ♥♥

 

New beginnings & change

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Before I talk about today’s topic, I just wanted to remind you that I have released my first PDF course which is aimed at helping you become more assertive and stop your people-pleasing habits.

To view the contents of this course, please click the link below:

Assertiveness course introduction

There are 5 places left for the discounted price I am offering so if you are interested then get in touch now by leaving a comment below.

In today’s post I wanted to talk about the challenge of new beginnings..

As much as they can be exciting and refreshing, new beginnings can sometimes be very tough. The fear of the unknown can be very daunting.

When things don’t go as we planned, how do we deal with the fallout?

No matter how perfectly we may have planned everything and thought everything through, the uncontrollable will always be there..

What if we moved to a new location and then our dream job ended up being a nightmare?

What if our new partner cheated on us?

What if we changed careers only to realise that it isn’t what we thought it would be?

How do we cope with life’s unexpected challenges?

After the initial disappointment or grief, how do we keep moving forward?

What if we get very scared and anxiety starts creeping in to our daily lives?

Owning our fears gives us control over our worries rather than our worries and fears controlling us.

Asking ourselves ‘What am I scared of?” can be very helpful. Writing down our fears can also help us clarify things a bit more.

Trying to change our negative thoughts into more positive ones, can make a huge difference in the way we feel. CBT works wonders for this!

If we think to ourselves that ‘every cloud has a silver lining’, then we can give ourselves a temporary boost of hope.

Having supportive friends or family around us can also greatly help..

Sometimes though we can feel more down than we had anticipated and sometimes we may feel so unmotivated that all we want to do is stay in bed and hide all day! That is also okay, as long as it doesn’t become a habit!

The following quote is one of my favourites regarding change:

“When we make a change, it’s so easy to interpret our unsettledness as unhappiness, and our unhappiness as a result of having made the wrong decision. Our mental health and emotional states fluctuate madly when we make big changes in our lives, and some days we could tight-rope across Manhattan, and other days we are too weary to clean our teeth. This is normal. This is natural. This is change.” — Jeanette Winterson

When we look back on the tough times in our life, do we ever find that they taught us something useful?

I have had 2 of these moments..The 2 toughest times in my life, helped me make huge changes in my life for the better and for those times I will be forever grateful!

As Freud once said:

“One day, in retrospect, the years of struggle will strike you as the most beautiful.” — Sigmund Freud

Thanks for reading

Love Athina ♥♥

© All blog posts and images are owned by me and Courage Coaching. Please don’t use without consent and only re-blog if you would like to use the information on here.

 

Sexual abuse Youtube Video-Part 2

Hello dear followers,

I have just completed the 2nd part of my sexual abuse video series.I know this topic isn’t relevant to a lot of you but for those it is relevant to, I hope it helps.If you have only just started coming to terms with any past sexual abuse, then this video series will be useful.

As I did at the end of the first video, which you can find here : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EKlfQMVeyBA , in this 2nd video I list a more comprehensive set of questions that you can ask yourself. The more of these you can relate to, the more support you will need in your recovery of sexual abuse.

Much love to you

Athina ♥♥

© All blog posts and images are owned by me and Courage Coaching. Please don’t use without consent and only re-blog if you would like to use the information on here.

How sexual abuse affects survivors in intimate relationships-YouTube Video-Part 1

Sexual abuse of any kind, whether that is long term childhood sexual abuse or sexual assault, has a profound effect on whoever experiences it.

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Since starting my first blog nearly 2 years ago, I have come across so many sexual abuse survivors, who have brought me to tears with their resilience and courageousness. I have met both men and women who have been through hell and back and have suffered far worse experiences than I ever did. This video was created with them in mind and for one of them in particular who asked me to do a video on this important topic.

I have learnt so much more about myself through doing research on this heartbreaking topic. I have also learnt how insidious sexual abuse can be and how many layers of trauma a survivor has to work through before reaching a more comfortable state of being.This video will be PART 1 of a 2 video series.It is such a sensitive topic and I want to make sure I cover as much as possible for those who may be affected by a past experience and may not even realise it yet. I am currently working through a list of questions that survivors can ask themselves, so they can have a better idea of where their difficulties lie in relation to sexual intimacy. At the end of this first video I have included some of these questions. How many of these did you answer ‘Yes’ to? I really hope that your answer is ‘None’.

Love Athina ♥

© All blog posts and images are owned by me and Courage Coaching. Please don’t use without consent and only re-blog if you would like to use the information on here.

Beauty is in the human spirit..

What do you define as beauty?

Beauty for me is a lot of things.

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Photography and art is beautiful.

The gorgeous colours of nature all around us is beautiful.

A message of love and comfort is beautiful.

The generosity & kindness in people’s eyes is beautiful.

The strength & courage of the human spirit is beautiful.

The ability to self-reflect & heal is beautiful.

The incredible firefighters, policemen, doctors, nurses, first responders, teachers, loving parents, foster carers, careworkers, psychologists, survivors and humanitarians that make a huge difference in this world are beautiful (and so many more I haven’t listed..).

Beauty for me is in the human spirit that perseveres against all odds.

Beauty for me is in the resilience of the poorest people, the people who suffer the most but are able to still offer love, compassion & understanding.

Beauty for me is in the highly sensitive person, the empath, the artist & the volunteer.

Beauty is all around us and it is found in the simplest things in life..

Beauty is about stopping to smell the roses..it is about living in the moment and appreciating all that you have in life..it is about loving yourself enough to accept yourself completely and treating others with respect & love..

What is beautiful to you?

Love Athina ♥

© All blog posts and images are owned by me and Courage Coaching. Please don’t use without consent and only re-blog if you would like to use the information on here.

 

2nd Video on emotional flashbacks

Hello fellow bloggers & friends,

I hope you had a good weekend and have started your week with hope in your heart. I have been unusually busy over the last week, as hubby has been on holiday from work. My mornings have been completely transformed from work & ‘me’ time, to long breakfasts and lots of ‘us’ time. We just celebrated our 2nd wedding anniversary on Saturday and took a mini break away in the wonderful town of Braunschweig. An escape from the usual routine we are well accustomed to, is so incredibly refreshing and enriching.

Although hubby is still on holiday this week as well, I want to make sure I keep up my blogging and Youtube Videos, even if at a lesser frequency.

I have finally managed to set up my new webcam and got the sound on the microphone to the level it should be at. I can safely say that the quality of my Youtube videos will finally be at an acceptable level.Hoorah 🙂

Although I started off my video today thinking it would only be a very short trial one (to test out my new webcam), it ended up being a long one!

The video is about emotional flashbacks once again and how to manage them.

The video below is the 2nd one I have posted on this topic, as I have received a few more requests to talk more about this difficult area of CPTSD.

Love Athina ♥

Ps: I finally received my full & approved ‘Certificate in Coaching’ today after completing the written assignment and waiting a long 12 weeks for the course tutors to correct it.

Unfortunately, they forgot to add my married name in brackets as I had originally requested but despite this, I am very very pleased 🙂

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© All blog posts and images are owned by me and Courage Coaching. Please don’t use without consent and only re-blog if you would like to use the information on here.

You are loved, you are enough

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I know there are so many of you battling your demons every day..It takes guts..It takes courage to fight the war inside your head..

This post is for all of you who are struggling..One breath at a time is so important when the world is feeling especially cruel..

This blogging community supports so many people with mental illness…

So Reblog this post and support each other..

Love Athina ♥

 

Grief

Although grief is a huge part of life, it is something that none of us want to experience.

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We can grieve over the loss of a loved one or beloved pet.

We can grieve over the loss of a job or home.

We can grieve whenever a new change happens in our lives, such as the loss of personal freedom when we have children or the loss of certain abilities when we become physically or mentally ill.

Sometimes the reasons we grieve are very subtle.

In general though, the journey through grief is a long one and it is important to give oneself time to grieve and to endure the overwhelming emotions that often accompany grief. Everyone moves at his or her own pace and along this path there will be circumstances which hinder one’s progress and circumstances which assist one’s progress. It may even take a lifetime to reach the desired goals of acceptance and inner peace.

If you are someone who grew up in an abusive & invalidating home, you will experience a more complicated type of grief. You will go through a grieving process which can take several years and will sometimes never completely go away. To not have had a nurturing & safe childhood means that you never experienced yourself as feeling nurtured & unconditionally loved. You will never, ever know what it is like to have healthy parents because this only happens once in your lifetime.You might only get glimpses of healthy families from friends that are lucky enough to have this and this will deeply hurt in its’ own way. If you were fostered, you might have finally managed to experience unconditional love later in your childhood but this still doesn’t completely undo the damage you have already experienced.

There are many ways to deal with grief. Ways that most of us have experienced to be healthy, such as allowing ourselves to cry and deeply feel our emotions of despair & unfairness.Crying doesn’t make us weak, it can actually strengthen us emotionally and physically. Crying stimulates production of endorphins which are the “feel good” hormones in our body.

Other ways are to turn to friends for support, write a journal or blog online. Exercise is also a great antidote to grief, no matter how hard it feels to actually do any.

The thing about grief that is important to remember is that it can feel mentally and physically exhausting. Practicing self-care during periods of grief is crucially important.

Rest & healthy eating are paramount during times of grief and reducing things like alcohol & drugs is also very important, as although you might feel like numbing yourself, this will only prolong the process of grieving.

If you are spiritual or have another faith, then this will also help you when you are feeling at your lowest.

It is also very important to try and avoid other stressful situations, especially at the early stages of grief.

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What are your experiences with grief?

If you are currently grieving, then please feel free to use this page as an outlet for your painful emotions at the moment and for support.

Comments are always welcome..

Much love,

Athina ♥

© All blog posts and images are owned by me and Courage Coaching. Please don’t use without consent and only re-blog if you would like to use the information on here.

 

Recovery from abuse- 3 basic stages & how to identify whether you have reached the acceptance stage of recovery

Happy Monday fellow bloggers. This is quite a late post, so I hope it reaches some of you.

I have just done another video on YouTube, where I talk about the 3 main stages of recovery that someone goes through, in particular concerning the recovery from childhood narcissistic abuse. I also talk a little bit about the acceptance stage of recovery, which I personally found the toughest in my own recovery.

Acceptance that you parents weren’t able to love you unconditionally, is a painful, rejecting reality. It is easier to spend most of your adult life being in denial of this, as it is such an incomprehensible reality to accept.

Once you are able to reach this stage of acceptance however, you feel like a huge burden has been lifted off you.

I wish all of you who struggle with this sort of realisation, to be able to finally reach this stage one day.

Love Athina ♥

© All blog posts and images are owned by me and Courage Coaching. Please don’t use without consent and only re-blog if you would like to use the information on here.

Setting boundaries with toxic people

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Love Athina ♥

© All blog posts and images are owned by me and Courage Coaching. Please don’t use without consent and only re-blog if you would like to use the information on here.